Doctoral Student Defends Dissertation With Katana Blade


After completing her doctoral studies in contemporary American BBQ smoking philosophy, local scholar Maya Warriorsmith, 24, was asked to defend her dissertation and responded as she best knew how.

“This is how the coastal Daimyo held off the Mongols”, said Warriorsmith, while gracefully weilding her blade in front of her terrified inquisitors, “And this is how I’ll hold off Professor McNeil.”

The academic panel, however, was surprised to see this form of defense take hold in an academic setting.

“Can’t say I’ve ever seen this before”, said Dr. Marcus Sweatervest, Professor of Kansas City Culinary Studies, “Usually they defend their dissertations with data, peer-reviewed studies or nunchucks.”

At press time, Warriorsmith was looking forward to defending her parking space at Costco with the same instrument.

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