Jesus Rises From The Dead, Finds Himself In HOA Meeting

JERUSALEM –

After returning from a weekend in Heaven, Jesus of Nazareth returned to find his flock squabbling over the usual agenda items.

“Well, nice of the Son of Man to finally show up to one of these”, snickered HOA President Nancy Di Kareno, 53, “Especially since he always violates the no miracles clause and brings down my property value with all that riff-raff he hangs around with.”

Disciples, however, were glad to see him in attendance despite the board’s cool reception.

“Well, it’s clear it was Linda who ratted him out to the Romans”, said Mary Savedalot, 30, “But where does she get off, anyway? That loudmouth hasn’t cut her crabgrass since Herod II was born.”

At press time, Jesus implored the HOA board to turn the other cheek to parking violations by the Essenes.