A man in glasses and suit giving a speech.

Breaking: Americans Congratulate Argentinian President-Elect Milei, Wish Him Luck as New Leader of Mexico


BUENOS AIRES –

After a stunning upset that saw the outspoken firebrand win the Argentinian Presidency, Americans from all backgrounds have come together to support his governance over a country he doesn’t govern.

“Bout time they had a leader like him”, said Jim Bob BobJim, 52, of Clarksville, convinced that Argentina and Mexico are one and the same, “We need to help ’em shore up our border.”

Others were equally supportive of a President they hope will solve crises that are currently raging in a completely different hemisphere.

“Those Argentinian cartels are just awful”, said Mary McMeatloaf, 63, of Hastings, presumably referring to the consortium of Malbec producers in the Luján de Cuyo region, “How many more Americans need to suffer cuz they can’t get it under control??”

At press time, Americans were also busy congratulating the Mexican Presidents of El Salvador and Peru for strong year-over-year economic growth.


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