Divine Feminine Seeks To Reunite With Divine Masculine As Long As He’s Over Six Feet Tall And Makes Multiple Six Figures


Looking to complete the cycle of separation and return to its essence of oneness, the Divine Feminine is seeking its Divine Masculine counterpart, with a few notable caveats.

“It would be great if the inverse of my energy field had broad shoulders too”, said the Divine Feminine, rapidly swiping through substandard Divine Masculine profiles, “And he better damn well not live with his parents.”

The Divine Masculine, when reached for comment, seemed perturbed by this set of particular demands.

“I’m out here busting my hump every day to create matter from the field of thought”, said the Divine Masculine, wanting nothing more than to be left alone in the 8th dimension with a cold one, “What’s she bring to the table anyway? You know, besides the base foundation for all of creation itself.”

At press time, the Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine were rumored to have met for coffee in the seedlings of a new universal consciousness, with the Divine Masculine claiming it went great while the Divine Feminine lamented the complete lack of any spark.

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