Universe Still Trying To Figure Out How To Monetize Creation

Unified Field –

After creating itself in order to experience itself in an infinite number of complex, dazzling and inspiring manifestations, the universe still finds itself frustrated by not being able to monetize this work of art.

“My Tik-Tok coach says I should short-form nebulas and red dwarves to gin up engagement”, said the universe, “Maybe they’re right. I don’t know any sponsors willing to pony up if I can’t get eyeballs on these things.”

The universe, originally creating from a space of love and inspiration, has repeatedly been told that only the monetization of said creation matters.

“While you were busy ****ing around with breathtaking sunsets and intelligent life, another universe was getting up at 5 a.m. to partner with top brands”, said Hustle G. Broseph, interdimensional influencer, “And everyone knows the whole purpose of creating a galactic supercluster is to get a pimped-out yacht in Miami.”

At press time, the universe was considering a partnership where it would create Planet X, brought to you by your friends at Ford Lincoln Mercury of Omaha.